Love is not a feeling, but it is a commitment. When you “fall in love”, it’s more about what you have in common, time you’re spending together, friendship, companionship and of course, the physical chemistry that you have with each other. These are all important in a marriage, however the most important thing is the sincere commitment that you make to each other. This may not be what most people consider romantic love, but without it, your future together will, most likely be very short. Why, you ask? Life gets in the way. You will go through difficult times in your life together. It’s hard to be “romantic” when money is tight or illness becomes a part of your life together or you don’t agree about how to discipline the children. I could go on and on with the difficulties that tend to pop up in our lives, but this post is about how to make sure that your relationship is solid and ready for anything that comes!
There are also times in your life together, when he/she irritates you or their hobbies or interests don’t mesh with yours anymore. As time goes by and we get older, we do change and sometimes we begin new careers or it seems that your lives are going in opposite directions. When these things happen, if you’ve made a true commitment, not based on feelings, you can get through all these obstacles. You’ve heard people say, “we fell out of love”. This is really a ridiculous statement, it’s really that one or more of the things I mentioned above has happened. This is the reason for “commitment”!
My husband and I have been married for over 25 years now and we’ve been through many difficult things together, but our love/commitment to each other stands firm and our relationship is stronger because of these difficulties that we’ve shared. I could never tell you everything in this blog, but someday in a memoir. We’ve been through extreme financial difficulties, disagreements about where to live, infertility, not to mention the adoption of our boys from Ukraine. So, whether you’re just in love or your engaged, or maybe you’re even married, I hope and pray this helps guide you in making the right decisions for your life and theirs. From a personal standpoint, I can say that this commitment is extremely important, to the success of your marriage. So, remember these things and be on the lookout in the future for our memoir.